So shall we take a lesson on what various people think about the age old question: Why did the chicken cross the road?
AL GORE: I invented that chicken. I raised chickens on the family farm. With my own two hands I fed them, I watered them, I shoveled after them. Until I draw my last breath, I will not rest until every chicken is safe to cross the road. My opponent's chicken policy is a risky scheme that will endanger social security.
GEORGE W: I think my record in Texas shows my concern for chickens crossing the road everywhere. My policies will ensure that no chicken will be left behind. Additionally, they will have the right to invest their egg money in ways that will ensure they have a retirement that will provide for them.
HILLARY CLINTON: It takes a village to raise a chicken. I've been all over New York State listening to chickens everywhere. I've been a fan of New York chickens my whole life.
JOHNNY COCHRAN: You think you saw that chicken cross the road? But what's the real story? The L.A.P.D. made it LOOK like that chicken crossed the road. That Mark Furman has been after that chicken since the day it was born. Have that chicken try on the glove; if it does not fit, you must acquit!
COL. SANDERS: I missed one?
DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us the chicken crossed the road and that was good enough for us.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we are quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on that chicken.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2008, which will not only cross the road, but will lay eggs, file your important documents and balance your checkbook.
AND FINALLY............ BILL CLINTON: Hmmmm......Nice legs